I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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