the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I think your dad took our porno
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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