the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I don't think brook has ever known best
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Randomize