Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize