I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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