After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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