I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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