Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
