yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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