He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
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