She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
You took a bar mat shot.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize