put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
