you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
