Banned from zoo.
Again?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
she pinky promised me she was 18
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
My life is pants optional.
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