the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize