I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
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