i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
