why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize