he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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