Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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