Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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