i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
