break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
He kissed a someone with a penis
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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