I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
