dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
