You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
