Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
So many bounce houses so little time
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
