just tell him i said nine months
That's when you crack a 10am beer
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Your shirt... Was in my pants
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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