I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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