Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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