The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Randomize
