I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
you inspire me to be a worse person
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I have so many feelings about this burrito
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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