I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Randomize
