How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
