So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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