yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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