i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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