I should be sponsored by Trojan
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
