oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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