There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
