He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
