This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
