She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Randomize
