Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
