I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
