is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize