I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
then he tried to convert me to islam
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
