I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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