hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
