sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Its about making memories worth repressing
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
