so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
