Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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